The Ticket Refunds

...Maybe reading THIS will help you to understand how TAX refunds work.

Five thousand people go to a baseball game, but the game was rained out, therefore a refund was due.

The team was about to mail out the refunds when a group of congressional Liberals called and complained that they should really be sending out the ticket refunds based on the  Democrat National Committee's  interpretation of 'fairness'.

Originally, of course, the refunds were to be paid based on the price each person had paid for the tickets.  Unfortunately that meant most of the refund money would be going to the ticket holders who had purchased the most expensive tickets.  That, according to the liberal ideal, is considered totally unfair, so a decision was made to pay out the refunds as follows: 
1. All people in the $10 seats will get back $15.  
...After all, they have less money to spend on tickets to begin with.  Call it an "Earned Income Ticket Credit."  Persons "earn" it by having few skills, poor work habits, and low ambition, thus keeping them at entry-level wages.

2. All people in the $25 seats will get back $25,
...because it just "seems fair."

3. All people in the $50 seats will get back $1,
...because they already make a lot of money and really don't need a refund.  After all, if they can afford that $50 ticket, they must not be paying nearly enough in taxes.

4. All people in the $75 luxury box seats will each have to pay an additional $25.  
This is called the "Alternative Minimum Ticket Tax".

5. All people walking past the stadium that couldn't afford to buy a ticket for the game each will get a $10 refund,
...even though they didn't pay anything for the tickets originally. They need the most help.  Also known as Affirmative Action.
...NOW do you understand?

...If not, please just contact Rep. Nancy Pelosi, Sen. Teddy Kennedy, Sen. John Kerry or Sen. Hillary Clinton.   I am SURE they will be happy to explain the 'fairness' of all this to you.